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GRACE BLOGS COLLECTION

Do people feel valued and respected after communicating with you?

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  • Do people feel valued after communicating with you?
  • Are you more interested in preserving your relationships or being right?
  • Do you know how to effectively communicate your thoughts and feelings in every situation?

People can’t read your mind and they don’t know what’s in your heart. That means you have to communicate what you’re thinking and feeling, especially to those you love and work with and definitely with your family.

Often when we attempt to communicate we do it through frustration, fear and pain from the past. We can learn to put people first and learn to value people. If we seek to preserve relationship first we will express what’s on our our hearts and minds in love and respect.

This series will give you a solid method for communication to leave people feeling valued and loved for the purpose of maintaining healthy relationships.

Grace Filled CommunicationMessage Titles

  1. Overcoming Offenses
  2. Grace Filled Communication
  3. The Critical Eye
  4. Giving Up Judgment
$4.00 – ADD MP3s to CART

The post Do people feel valued and respected after communicating with you? appeared first on Forward Ministries.

You Were Born to be Loved!

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You Were BornDeep on the inside of every human being is the inherent need to be loved, to know that they have value and worth.  No one can escape it nor deny it.  Some people try to act all macho and tough as if they don’t need to be loved, or that they don’t need anybody, but it is not true.  We all have the need to be loved, to know that we matter.

That inherent desire is hardwired into every single human being by our Creator.  The Bible tells us that God is love.  It also describes that God created man in His image and likeness.  We were created out of love, to love and to be loved.

It’s been proven that babies need human contact.  They need to be loved on.  They need that one-on-one attention.

As children are growing up, they want to be loved by their parents.  They want their parents to notice them.  I cannot count how many times, as a parent, I have heard one of my children say, “hey Dad, watch me. Hey, Dad, did you see me do that?  Hey, Dad, I can do this.” It’s all an attempt for me to pay attention to them, thus letting them know that they matter to me.

Teens, even though they certainly don’t act like it, want their parents’ approval, attention, and affection.  They are testing their boundaries as they begin to spread their wings of independence.  But they subconsciously want the safety of their parents’ boundaries.  They want to know that if they fail, their parents will be there to catch them.  Even the most rebellious teen wants someone to care about them.

That’s one reason why gangs are so attractive to some teens.  The gang offers love, family, acceptance and a place to belong.  Even though the love is misconstrued, the members feel loved.

As we mature, we look for a spouse to love and to love us.  We then want to create children to love.  Why do we have kids?  We know that they are a lot of work, very costly, and there’s a definite possibility that they will rebel, not listen and could reject us.  Yet, we continue to produce children because of the love that we want to give them, and receive from them.

We were born to be loved.

We were born to live in love.

We were born to love.

Love is at the core of our being because we were created in God’s image and He is love.  I wish that we could say that we are love, but we cannot.  Sin has distorted us, handicapped us, and made us inhumane to the point that we can utterly hate someone to the point of murder.  Hate is so ugly.

Hate causes us to devalue someone’s life.

"winter" (CC BY-SA 2.0) by shioshvili

“winter” (CC BY-SA 2.0) by shioshvili, text added, flickr.com

Hate causes us to want to hurt them.

Hate can destroy us.

We were born to love, not to hate.  We were born to be loved, not to be hated.

If we could only learn to receive God’s love, we would be changed.  If we can wake up every day realizing that we were born to be loved by Him, it would make the biggest difference.  I have been practicing that lately.  Each morning as I lay in my bed before I get up, and each night before I go to sleep, I repeat to myself, “I was born to be loved.”

Of course, the thoughts of all that I do wrong come through my head, but I quickly silence them by reminding myself that God doesn’t love me on the basis of what I do.  He loves me because of who He is.

That’s the beauty of loving others.  I don’t have to love people based on what they do or don’t do.  I can love them because I choose to.  It’s hard sometimes because of people’s rejection and attitudes towards me.  However, when I realize, and fully grasp, the fact that I was born to be loved and that I am loved immensely by the Father then I can reflect that love to others.

When I allow myself to be full of God’s love then I can give it away because I have a never ending supply.

As I realize how much He loves me and I look at others and realize that He loves them that much too, then should loving them be an issue for me?  It shouldn’t be.  It’s only when I let my personal judgments and critical thoughts about that person get in the way that I will stop loving them.  When I see them as God sees them, I will love them.  When I look at them through my human, imperfect eyes I may or may not love them. 

My earthly love tends to be conditional, which really isn’t love at all.  See my blog on Unconditional Love is an Oxymoron for a deeper discussion on this.

God’s love is unconditional because it’s based upon who He is rather than our actions.  What if we did the same?  What if we stopped looking at people’s actions as a basis for our love for them?  What if we just looked at them and realized their number one purpose in life is to be loved and our number one purpose in life was to love them?

I think the world would be a better place.

You were born to be loved!

Be Intentional About Loving People

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My family and I had a 20 minute conversation about love yesterday morning. Why did we take the time to have this discussion? Because we want to be a family that is intentional about loving people.

The thing that started us talking is that we’re getting ready to spend the next two weeks at JUMP Camp at our church. Steve and I are volunteering together the first week and the girls and I will be there again the second week.

Of course, JUMP Camp is going to be a blast and we are really looking forward to it, but we wanted to have a conversation beforehand to discuss, as a family, how we could be intentional about walking in love with others and with each other these next two weeks.

What we talked about as a family not only applies to our family or to JUMP Camp week, but to each of us in our everyday lives. This is why I decided to share our conversation about love with you!

As we each opened up and contributed to the conversation, these were the main points we covered.

Be Realistic

To start the conversation we discussed the fact that even though we are going to have a blast at camp, there will also be times when we get tired and there may even be moments when we feel exhausted. I personally think this was a very important part of our conversation that will help us be mentally prepared  to respond to others and to each other in love, when that happens.

I’m not saying we can’t believe God for an increase in energy over these next two weeks. We will believe for this and I believe we will have it, but when the sun is beating down on you and the noise level is continuously loud, the truth of the matter is, it can cause fatigue –  mentally, physically and emotionally.

Our family went to Six Flags several weeks ago. We have season passes this year and have these special bring-a-friend-free coupons that we can use a number of times during the season. We brought some friends of ours and had a really great time.

Six Flags is a place I spent a decent amount of time at growing up; therefore, I got so excited about our day of fun that I kept saying to everyone at the beginning of the day, “let’s stay all day, until the park closes.” (10pm) That sounded great until about 5 or 6pm when exhaustion seemed to hit every one of us at the same time! It wasn’t near as much fun after we got tired!

So…what do we do at JUMP Camp or in our everyday lives when we become physically, mentally or emotionally exhausted? The answers I’ll be sharing with you in this post apply to both.

1.) Remember why you’re doing what you’re doing

In our family discussion yesterday, we were reminding ourselves that we want to be a walking in love type of family. We talked about how we want to be a blessing in other people’s lives. We discussed how we want to be the light that Jesus said we are.

Of the 6000+ kids coming to JUMP Camp, a decent percentage of those kids haven’t ever heard the Gospel, nor do they go to church. You see how this one fact right here could change our whole perspective. This opportunity is much more than a camp – it’s a missions trip and God has given our family the opportunity to be change agents in the lives of these children.

Although Angel and Starr are not volunteering this year because this is their last year of being in camp, they can be all the things we talked about to their own friends over these next two weeks. They can be a blessing. They can walk in love. They can be an example. They can be a light. They can be change agents in the lives of their current friends and in the lives of the new 8th graders they’ll meet over the next two weeks.

2.) Constantly receive God’s love for yourself

Another aspect of our conversation was talking about the fact that we can, at any given moment, receive God’s love in a very personal way. Steve, my husband, suggested to all of us, “If we’re tired, we can close our eyes for a moment (when the time is convenient) and receive God’s love all over again.”

Since we’re there to extend God’s love to others, we talked about how we would only be able to do this if we are first receiving His love for ourselves.

After all…

1 John 4:19 says, 

We love each other because He loved us first. (NLT)

Receiving from God is one of the most important things we can spend our time doing, but I also believe receiving is one of the most overlooked things in the lives of many Christians. If we’re not careful we can spend all of our mental energy thinking about what we need to be doing for God and forget to receive from Him the wisdom, strength and ability we need to fulfill what He’s called us to.

3.) Become more rooted and grounded in knowing who you are in Christ

My husband Steve and I have been talking a lot lately about the amazing results we get from knowing who we are in Christ – from understanding that our true identity comes from being God’s child and also understanding that our worth and value is 100% wrapped up in the person we are in Christ Jesus. You know what I mean, the things the Bible talks about like: we’re new, complete , alive, holy, God’s workmanship, more than conquerors, overcomers, and forgiven in Him. And I’ve just barely gotten started with this short list compared to all the Biblical promises in God’s Word of everything we are in Christ.

Please do yourself a favor and search this phrase on google sometime soon: Who I am in Christ. Biblical promise after Biblical promise after Biblical promise will come up and if you’ll read them and remember them, you’ll see such an increase in your confidence level that this will in turn change your marriage, your relationships with your kids, your business, your personal life, and the list goes on.

I guarantee you that just the one fact alone that I am so much more convinced of who I am in Christ than the old Sandra was will make these two weeks at JUMP Camp and the fact that God has asked me to do everything I do in a spirit of love so much more than a possibility… as long as I keep the truth of God’s Word ever before me!

4.) Take care of yourself by exercising, getting enough sleep, eating healthy and drinking lots of water

Recently I had to take 3 months off from CrossFit in order to allow some physical symptoms I was having to subside. When I returned a month ago I noticed right away that my energy increased from working out again.

My Mom also started a walking program over a year ago. She walks 5 miles or more almost every day and her energy level is off the charts. She actually said she was praying for God to give her more energy and He gave her a desire to walk. She has enjoyed the walking and the results from the walking so much that she never wants to miss her walks!

Thinking of exercise this way – that it actually increases our energy – can give us a whole new perspective about it. After all, it’s kind of difficult to get the things done in our lives that God has called us to do if we are tired all the time. It’s also difficult to walk in love consistently if we are tired all the time. This is precisely why I’m planning to go to CrossFit after being at camp all day long to continue my workouts this week. I won’t have to go everyday after camp, maybe 2 of the 4 days and I’ve already talked to the coach and told him I probably won’t be able to work as hard as everyone else because I’ll be in the sun a lot during the day, but I can still go and do a good workout. If I do, I bet it will give me more energy for JUMP camp week!

Am I going to feel like going to CrossFit after camp. Probably not. This is exactly why I am making an intentional decision ahead of time. I’ll also use wisdom with it. For instance, I usually workout 4 days a week and I may only be able to do 3 days a week for the next two weeks, but I’m not going to mentally set myself up to not go at all.

My husband Steve also works out very consistently. He frequently reads articles about the benefits of exercise and we talk about them. We encourage each other in this area because we have seen the results, far too often, of people who have neglected exercise their entire life and now they’re totally dependent on others to care for them. We don’t want that to be us so we have decided to be intentional in the area of exercise…whether we feel like it or not!

Now, getting enough sleep is an area I could use a little more intentionality in! I do good for a period of time and then I get off course, but our family has been talking for several weeks now about how we will all be needing 8 hours of sleep these next two weeks for sure because we don’t want to go to JUMP Camp tired. That would not be a good recipe for treating others with love.

These two weeks are going to force me to get in bed at 8pm since I will be getting up at 4am. That sounds crazy to some people, but I love getting up early. My days just go better when I get up early, but I am a morning person. I’m believing these next two weeks of being forced to keep this schedule will help me get back into this habit in my everyday life because I admit, this is an area I need to receive God’s grace in to form a better habit, more consistently.

Now, I do want to say I am a very energetic person. I always have been, but especially the new and improved Sandra who doesn’t get bogged down with guilt and condemnation, but instead spends her time receiving and living by God’s grace. So I may not even need 8 hours of sleep every single night, but I need to give my body the opportunity to get 8 hours of sleep in case it does need it.

In regards to eating healthy, for me that means taking the time to prepare healthy food each week and carrying a cooler with me everywhere I go to keep my blood sugar from dipping too low since I’ve had low blood sugar issues all my life. It’s totally manageable and isn’t even a problem if I eat right and eat often enough, but if I don’t, it can get whacked out for days.

In fact, right now I’m starting to get hungry and one of the times I despise stopping to eat the most is when I’m writing. I’m going to town here, typing away and don’t want to stop and then have to take the time to get refocused and get Back in the flow again when I return; but if I want to feel my best and if I want to be able to react to others in love on a more consistent basis, I don’t have a choice. So I’ll be back in about 15 minutes ok?

I’m back, and stopping to take the time to eat was so worth it. I feel wonderful now that my blood sugar is level again.

Regarding the food at JUMP Camp, part of the fun is the fun food; therefore, we have been talking to our girls for several weeks now about what they’ll be allowed to eat at JUMP Camp. There is actually nothing they can’t eat and they will have snow cones available every day and, in addition, Wednesday is ice cream day. We told them they could have 1 snow cone per day and the ice cream in addition on Wednesday. We are also letting them have certain things in their lunches that we don’t give them often like chips and white bread, BUT we made an agreement with them that they will need to eat healthy the rest of the week at every meal. This way they can enjoy the same things the other kids are getting to enjoy at JUMP Camp and not feel left out, but not end up sick afterwords either.

Finally, speaking of the importance of water consumption, the average adult human body is 50-65% water. Our cells must have water to live and our vital organs contain 65-85% water, depending on the organ. It always inspires me to drink more water when I read facts like this.

I am blessed that I actually really like the taste of water. It’s all I drink, but I know lots of people can’t stand water. That has to be hard, but I will say (as a way of encouragement) that there have been numerous times when I have gotten out of the the habit of drinking enough water and when I got back on track, I found the more I drank it  the more I wanted it.

To help myself drink the amount of water I need each day I recently purchased 3 water bottles and placed them different places in my home – my bedroom, my office and the kitchen!

 1 Corinthians 13 says, 

Love Is the Greatest

13 If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. 3 If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it;[a] but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing.

4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

8 Prophecy and speaking in unknown languages[b] and special knowledge will become useless. But love will last forever! 9 Now our knowledge is partial and incomplete, and even the gift of prophecy reveals only part of the whole picture! 10 But when the time of perfection comes, these partial things will become useless.

11 When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things. 12 Now we see things imperfectly, like puzzling reflections in a mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity.[c] All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely.

13 Three things will last forever—faith, hope, and love—and the greatest of these is love. (NLT)

If you have not yet made Jesus your Savior and received the wonderful joy that His finished work on the cross has provided for you to live in, please visit my page here titled Jesus In The Driver’s Seat. On this page I explain the good news of the gospel and you will have the opportunity to pray a prayer of salvation, making Jesus your Savior! Jesus loves you and His arms are wide open!

Sandra McCollom

Good Triumphs Over Evil

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Good always triumphs over evil. Even though it doesn’t always appear that good is winning, ultimately, good always triumphs.

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. -Romans 12:21(NASB)

Love triumphs over hate.
see Luke 6:27-28

Forgiveness triumphs over unforgiveness.
see Ephesians 4:31-32

Humility triumphs over pride.
see Proverbs 11:2

Patience triumphs over impatience.
see Colossians 1:11

Gentleness triumphs over harshness.
see Proverbs 15:1

Generosity triumphs over selfishness.
see Acts 20:35

Mercy triumphs over judgement.
see Luke 6:36

Now aren’t you glad your on the side of good! I sure am!

If you have not yet made Jesus your Savior and received the wonderful joy that His finished work on the cross has provided for you to live in, please visit my page here titled Jesus In The Driver’s Seat. On this page I explain the good news of the gospel and you will have the opportunity to pray a prayer of salvation, making Jesus your Savior! Jesus loves you and His arms are wide open!

Sandra McCollom

The Atonement of God: Building Your Theology on a Crucivision of God (book review)

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Why did Jesus really die?  Was it to defeat sin?  Was it to appease atonement of godthe wrath of an angry God?  Was it so that God wouldn’t have to punish us because He punished Jesus?  Was it to ransom us from the devil?  Is God a child abuser? All these questions are answered within various theories as to why Jesus died.  In this book, Jeremy looks at the four most popular theories:  penal substitutionary theory, the moral influence theory, the ransom theory, and the Christus Victor theory.  Utilizing the Christus Victor theory, he shows us how the death of God was a non-violent act from the actions of God, although it was certainly very violent from the actions of men.

Jeremy gives us a good solid understanding of the core teaching of each of them, contrasting the pros and cons of each one.  His book clearly lays out a scenario in which the crucifixion of Jesus was not God pouring out His wrath on Jesus, nor God inflicting great punishment upon His beloved Son so that He wouldn’t have to inflict punishment upon humanity.  His view is that God is a non-violent Father as expressed through the life of Jesus. It’s upon this non-violent view that Jeremy spends most of his time.

Don’t read this book if you are not willing to at least consider what he is saying.  As a pastor, I have found that far too many Christians are close minded when it comes to looking at something that may go against what they have been taught all their lives.  Most American Christians have been taught the Penal Substitutionary Theory and may have a hard time pulling away from that.  As you read this book, keep an open mind and think about what Jeremy is saying, especially if you hold to any view other than the Christus Victor view.

Jeremy even explains his concept of why there is so much violence in the Old Testament.  It is this subject here that I would love to sit down with him and have a conversation as I liked what he said, but I am not sure that I could totally put my views and thoughts in that same basket just yet. The violence of the Old Testament is still a concept that I am grappling with.

Overall, this is a great book.  If you are looking to study the atonement and its differing views, then I would highly recommend this book.  Jeremy is a great teacher and communicator.  He has definitely done his research and is well versed in what he believes and why he believes it.  He is definitely someone that I recommend that you follow.  Through his books, blogs, and podcasts, I have been deeply challenged in my thinking, which, to me, is always a good thing!

You can find out more about Jeremy at his website:  www.redeeminggod.com.  You can purchase his book there or on Amazon.

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HELP! I Am Trying to Love

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Chained Sad Heart - 900

I've had it with exhortations to love more, or better, or longer. In my youth I sang the song, "What the world needs now is love, sweet love..." I know we should love our neighbors, heck, even our enemies. I can see the damage being done between religious and political rivals. I wish the world would just stop fighting and love one another. Still if I hear another preacher tell me to love more, I'm calling the police to stop the harassment. Surely in today's environment, there must be some regulation that would stop such people from making me feel uncomfortable. Aren't my human rights being violated?

Jesus said, "If you love me, you will keep my commandments." (John 14:15) For years I interpreted that to mean I could and should show my love by keeping Jesus' commands. In other words, I was focused on "keeping" rather than "loving." I should have noticed that such an interpretation, though consistent with popular religion, was contrary to the teaching of Jesus. He made it very clear that we cannot love until we have been loved. We cannot give what we don't have. We cannot tell what we don't know.

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another." (John 13:34-35)

The kind of love that was revealed in Jesus is of divine origin. It is galaxies beyond the kind of love humans can generate. He had no need to use people for His own acceptance or significance. He didn't need to be vindicated; there was nothing pressuring him to manipulate others to His view. He loved with nothing to gain personally -- nothing but the joy of seeing another person being built up and blessed. And He didn't have the need to make sure others knew how well He was doing at loving.

When we have been touched by the delight of God's love, we can't help but pass it on. In fact, it would be safe to say that if we are not sharing His love, we don't really have it. This love is God's nature. Some think that before creation, He was so thrilled with the love shared between the persons of the Godhead, He wanted to share it with others, and that's why He created a universe that could experience the same joy He had.

Whether that's the reason He created us or not, we know God wants to share His love. And if God meant to share it, wouldn't those loved by Him do the same? Jesus demonstrated it in His life, death, resurrection, and ascension. He fixed it so that humans could know God as Father, and in that relationship be fully satisfied. They would have no need to prove themselves. They would have no fear of want. They would not need to put others down in order to rise. They would be able to risk loving because they are safe in his care. In short, they could love -- and love doing it.

Trying to love like Jesus does, without being loved by Him, is like trying to breathe without air. It's much more taxing than living by religious standards of behavior. We could technically keep the outward commands of Jesus behaviorally without loving Him, but we cannot accept His love without responding in obedience to His words.

His love didn't just open the door to heaven when we die. It opened the door to share His life now. We get to be partners with Him, as He loves the world He created. We get to be free from our own agendas because we are captured by His. He is meeting all our needs so that we don't demand others to serve us. Living in His love releases us from the anchor of self-obsession and empowers us to be the display of His love.

If love seems hard to you, check to see whether you are focused on keeping His commands or on loving the one who loves you so much. Loving precedes keeping -- and you will love it.

I’m Almost A Parent Of Teenagers

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image

Starr (L) and Angel (R) are gonna be 13 this weekend!

Unbelievable!

You know, I used to think that as a parent, I wasn’t suppose to be my kids’ friend, but I was only suppose to be their parent until they became an adult at which time I could then start being their friend. The only problem was, I tried this approach for 9 years and it didn’t work for us.

I was legalistic and, although I never abused my girls, they felt more afraid in my “authoritative presence” than they felt comfortable around me. Not all the time, of course, but far too often.

Really, what was happening was I treating my girls the same way I wrongly thought God was treating me. I was rarely comfortable in God’s presence and was almost constantly afraid of what He was thinking or how He was feeling about me.

But THANK GOD that by His grace, my view of God and my view of parenting changed; therefore, the past 4 years have been very different for my girls and I. The results have proven to me that it’s a very good thing to be both friend and parent to your kids. In fact, it’s worked so well for us that our girls absolutely LOVE spending time with us. It’s certainly not because we’re perfect parents, because, of course we’re not perfect.

We just all do life together. We’re a team. We love each other. We allow each other to be human…to fail. And we forgive…often.

What better time for a child to feel like they not only have a parent, but a really good friend that they can lean on other than while they’re growing up and trying to navigate all the mazes that life brings!

My goodness I love my girls with all my heart. I’m not afraid of having teenagers. I’m looking forward to it.  AND the best news is …we get to spend eternity together!

If you have not yet made Jesus your Savior and received the wonderful joy that His finished work on the cross has provided for you to live in, please visit my page here titled Jesus In The Driver’s Seat. On this page I explain the good news of the gospel and you will have the opportunity to pray a prayer of salvation, making Jesus your Savior! Jesus loves you and His arms are wide open!

Sandra McCollom

Growing in Grace Together – Lucas Miles – Good God

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A while back I had Lucas Miles as a guest on the podcast. Lucas is the President of the Oasis Network for Churches (OasNet), and he has written a soon-to-be-released book called Good God - The One We Want to Believe In but Are Afraid to Embrace.  Lucas is back as a guest on the podcast to talk about the book, and why many people struggle to embrace this God that we claim to be good, but yet He is blamed for so many bad things - even by those in the church.

A common question that people ask is, "Why does God allow bad things to happen?"  Lucas shares some radical thoughts on this, including tackling the premise that God "allows" bad things to happen.  Also, does God put sickness on people, or put them through problems and "trials," so that He can teach them a lesson or so He can then swoop in and "get the glory" for healing and helping? 
It's amazing how many people think that God is like this, and Lucas does a great job at showing how the nature of God is always good, and that He never harms us.

The book has received praise from many people, including Kevin Sorbo (actor, God's Not Dead), James B. Richards (author, The Gospel of Peace), Joanna Beasley (American Idol semifinalist and Christian recording artist), Paul Ellis (author, The Hyper-Grace Gospel) and many more.  I sure hope you enjoy this conversation about our good God, and that you're left with a much better understanding of and appreciation for the love and goodness of God.

To find out more about Lucas Miles, check out LucasMiles.org.



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Good News About God

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The apostle Paul, in recounting his ministry to the Christians of his day, said, “I have fully preached the gospel of Christ” (Romans 15:19). I believe that on this website and in my books and spoken ministry I have shared more than you need to know to live a successful Christian life and to maximise… Read More

The post Good News About God appeared first on Positive Words.

The Key To Humility

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I woke up this morning thinking about humility and this came to me.

The key to humility is knowing that any good thing that we’ve ever done or ever will do is because of God’s grace alone. JESUS is God’s grace personified; therefore, it’s really all about JESUS.

- If we’re able to live effective lives it’s all because of JESUS

- If we happen to have discipline in a certain area it’s because of JESUS

- If we choose to walk in love in a specific situation it’s because JESUS helped us

- If we are willing to forgive it’s because JESUS forgave us first

- If we happen to be helping people in any way it’s because JESUS made us able

- If we’re experiencing success in any area it’s because we’re with JESUS

I’m sure you would agree, this list could go on forever…

When we really understand it’s ALL because of JESUS we just want to brag about JESUS and point people to JESUS and be forever grateful to JESUS!

Made Alive in Christ

1 And you were dead in your trespasses and sins, 2 in which you formerly walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, of the spirit that is now working in the sons of disobedience. 3 Among them we too all formerly lived in the lusts of our flesh, indulging the desires of the flesh and of the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, even as the rest. 4 But God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, 5 even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), 6 and raised us up with Him, and seated us with Him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, 7 so that in the ages to come He might show the surpassing riches of His grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. 8 For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; 9 not as a result of works, so that no one may boast. 10 For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them. -Ephesians 2 (NASB)

What else is there to say.

IT’S ALL BECAUSE OF JESUS. 

When we remember this we hold the key to humility.

If you have not yet made Jesus your Savior and received the wonderful joy that His finished work on the cross has provided for you to live in, please visit my page here titled Jesus In The Driver’s Seat. On this page I explain the good news of the gospel and you will have the opportunity to pray a prayer of salvation, making Jesus your Savior! Jesus loves you and His arms are wide open!

Sandra McCollom

God’s Treasure Chest – Romans 13

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Yay, we’re back to Romans! I love reading and studying for these blog posts! Remember though, my comments below in red are simply from what I have studied so far and/or just my own personal thoughts about these verses and my own experiences in regards to these verses. I realize that learning is progressive and I will gain more and more revelation each time I come across these same verses in the future. In other words, I don’t claim to know it all and I never will. This is not meant to be a commentary of Romans.

Romans 13:1-7 says,

1 Everyone must submit to governing authorities. For all authority comes from God, and those in positions of authority have been placed there by God.  2 So anyone who rebels against authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and they will be punished.  3 For the authorities do not strike fear in people who are doing right, but in those who are doing wrong. Would you like to live without fear of the authorities? Do what is right, and they will honor you. 4 The authorities are God’s servants, sent for your good. But if you are doing wrong, of course you should be afraid, for they have the power to punish you. They are God’s servants, sent for the very purpose of punishing those who do what is wrong.  5 So you must submit to them, not only to avoid punishment, but also to keep a clear conscience.

6 Pay your taxes, too, for these same reasons. For government workers need to be paid. They are serving God in what they do. 7 Give to everyone what you owe them: Pay your taxes and government fees to those who collect them, and give respect and honor to those who are in authority. (NLT)

I have to admit, It has alarmed me in the last number of years to see how some Christians think it’s ok to publicly gossip about those in positions of governmental authority, including the President. Of course, It’s not ok to privately gossip about those in authority over us either, but I mentioned public gossip because of some of the things I have read on social media.

I believe this attitude stems from a lack of genuine trust in God. There are some Christians out there who are trying to do God’s job. Haven’t we all done this a time or two (or 5 or 6 hundred times) ourselves? I know I have, but the truth is that when a person really believes that God can make a difference they stop gossiping and start praying and believing God to bring the changes in our Nation that need to be brought about. And just imagine all the great results that would come if every single one of us Christians started praying for those in authority over us instead of slandering them. One of the synonyms for slander means ‘to speak evil of.’

Of course, I’m not  saying all Christians do this by any means, but I can write this with conviction because I was that person for so many years who was behind the scenes complaining instead of actually doing something that would make a difference.

I’m also not saying there are not certain actions we should take, such as exercising our right to vote, etc, but any action we take needs to be a Spirit-led action that comes from a heart of love and prayer, not an action that comes from a heart of hate and self-effort.

For instance, this gathering is a brilliant, Spirit-led idea that will actually bring about genuine change in our nation. Click here to check it out: Together 2016 – The Campaign

This is going to be historic. I can feel it in my spirit. I couldn’t even read through the website with my husband without choking back tears. Why will this be historic?

Because #JesusChangesEverything

Now that God has changed me by His grace and continues to do so, I see many things differently than I used to. Here’s the bottom line for me now – here is what I ask myself: Did Jesus sit around and complain about the Roman government of His day and gossip about and slander those in governmental authority? He did not.

In the midst of the corruption that was going on in Jesus’ day, He prayed, He loved, He went about doing good and healing all who were oppressed by the devil. Jesus understood that the things that were going on in the government and in individual people’s lives were symptomatic of a deeper problem; therefore, He spent His time getting to the heart of the issues at hand.

I really love this statement that I’ve heard a number of people, including my own pastor, say:

I’d Rather Light A Candle Than Curse The Darkness

This is what Jesus did!

We can’t  forget that God is still the God of the impossible and no matter what’s going on around us, His kingdom shall reign forever and ever!

Revelation 11:15 says,

Then the seventh angel blew his trumpet, and there were loud voices shouting in heaven:

“The world has now become the Kingdom of our Lord and of his Christ, and He will reign forever and ever.”

OH YES HE WILL!

Instead of complaining, God needs us to spend our time praying for and speaking His Word over our government system, government leaders, and our President.

After all, Proverbs 21:1 says this:

The king’s heart is like channels of water in the hand of the Lord; He turns it whichever way He wishes.

And look what the Bible says in Hebrews 4:12 regarding the power of God’s Word:

For the word of God is alive and powerful. It is sharper than the sharpest two-edged sword, cutting between soul and spirit, between joint and marrow. It exposes our innermost thoughts and desires. (NLT)

The Word of God is the most powerful force on the planet. This is why we need to be speaking it over our nation and over our world!

The last thing I’ll say about this is that I do believe satan has some Christians distracted from what Jesus actually asked His followers to do.

Here’s what Jesus told us to do:

So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. 35 Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.” – John 13:34-35 (NLT)

and

31 Do to others as you would like them to do to you. 32 “If you love only those who love you, why should you get credit for that? Even sinners love those who love them! 33 And if you do good only to those who do good to you, why should you get credit? Even sinners do that much! 34 And if you lend money only to those who can repay you, why should you get credit? Even sinners will lend to other sinners for a full return. 35 “Love your enemies! Do good to them. Lend to them without expecting to be repaid. Then your reward from heaven will be very great, and you will truly be acting as children of the Most High, for He is kind to those who are unthankful and wicked. 36 You must be compassionate, just as your Father is compassionate.- Luke 6:31-36 (NLT)

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Romans 13:8-10 says,

8 Owe nothing to anyone—except for your obligation to love one another. If you love your neighbor, you will fulfill the requirements of God’s law. 9 For the commandments say, “You must not commit adultery. You must not murder. You must not steal. You must not covet.” These—and other such commandments—are summed up in this one commandment: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” 10 Love does no wrong to others, so love fulfills the requirements of God’s law. (NLT)

I’ve got great news for you regarding this last group of verses. When you make the choice to live your life under God’s grace, His grace will change you into a person who has a desire to walk in love. The key is to receive God’s grace no matter what.

I tell a story in my book about how, through the simple act of continuing to receive God’s grace, even when I didn’t feel I deserved it, I was set free from a lifelong bondage of being late almost everywhere I went. And when I say lifelong bondage, I’m not kidding. When I was in grade school I used to chase the school bus down the street in the morning because I would frequently leave my house too late to get to the bus stop. But thank God that about 3 years ago His grace changed my heart to such an extent that it gave me the desire to walk in love with people in this area by being on time!

It’s really true that a life lived by God’s grace will take you light years beyond any place that living under the law could ever take you.

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Romans 13:13-14 says, 

13 Because we belong to the day, we must live decent lives for all to see. Don’t participate in the darkness of wild parties and drunkenness, or in sexual promiscuity and immoral living, or in quarreling and jealousy. 14 Instead, clothe yourself with the presence of the Lord Jesus Christ. And don’t let yourself think about ways to indulge your evil desires. (NLT)

If you’re reading these verses through the lens of God’s grace you’re going to see them totally different than if you read them as a rule book. As a grace girl, what immediately stood out to me is the advice that Paul gave us to clothe ourselves with the presence of the Lord Jesus Christ.

I already know that if you and I learn to practice the presence of Jesus (which is what we were created for), the sins that Paul lists in these verses are not going to be alluring to us and even if there are things we are currently struggling with, the Bible says in 2 Corinthians 3:18 that as we behold Jesus we will be changed to be more and more like Him!

I’m not saying the sins don’t have to go. They gotta go, but there’s only one way they can be annihilated from any of our lives and that is by the presence of Jesus and the power of the Holy Spirit doing the work of change in us.

There are SO many ways that we can practice the presence of Jesus and behold Him. I go into this extensively in my book, I Tried Until I Almost Died, including giving you lots of practical examples as to what this looks like in your everyday life.

Next God’s Treasure Chest post will be on Romans 14

To find all my other God’s Treasure Chest posts just click here on My Grace Journey and then scroll down to the topic that says God’s Treasure Chest!

If you have not yet made Jesus your Savior and received the wonderful joy that His finished work on the cross has provided for you to live in, please visit my page here titled Jesus In The Driver’s Seat. On this page I explain the good news of the gospel and you will have the opportunity to pray a prayer of salvation, making Jesus your Savior! Jesus loves you and His arms are wide open!

Sandra McCollom

If You Forgive, You Win

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I’ve had to forgive so many people lately that I finally thought, maybe I need to write a blog post and call it If You Forgive, You Win.

Several times recently, people have treated me disrespectfully. You know what I mean – they looked at me or talked to me like I was stupid, like I didn’t quite measure up and definitely like I wasn’t as good as them.

Then, just yesterday we received fraud text alerts from our credit card company and once again someone out there decided it was ok to use our credit card info to purchase their stuff.

You’ve probably been through it as well. Shred the old credit card, get a new credit card, then spend hours updating all the companies with your new credit card information. My husband Steve is in the other room doing this very thing as I type.  It’s a hassle for sure.

In each of these situations the devil tried to talk me into not forgiving the offender and each time I knew I had a choice to make.

The purpose of this post is not to put the focus on look what happened to me, but to put the focus on the solution because we all have plenty of opportunities every day to be offended and become bitter and resentful. None of us are exempt.

When the first situation happened, as I walked away from the person, I knew I had a choice to make. I could stand there and rehash the way they just treated me or I could ask God for His help. I simply prayed to myself, God, I know I need to forgive this person. Can you please help me? 

The very next thing I purposely started thinking about was how I have talked to way too many people disrespectfully over the years as well, including my own kids and my husband. So instead of having me focus on what the other person did to me, God helped me set my mind on the fact that He has forgiven me of the very same offense so many times. This helped me tremendously in the first two situations because it immediately softened my heart toward the offenders.

The Apostle Paul reminds us of this truth in Colossians 3:12-14:

12-14 So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it. (MSG) 

So lets analyze this scripture, if you will, and see if we can find out what right beliefs make us willing and able to forgive others. After all, right believing leads to right living and wrong believing leads to wrong living.

The very first truth that jumped out at me is that we have been chosen by God for this new life of love. You may not always feel like loving those who have hurt you, but although feelings are very real, following them is not what will set you free. It’s the truth that sets you free.

So here’s the truth about you:

But you are not like that, for you are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God’s very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for He called you out of the darkness into His wonderful light. -1 Peter 2:9 (NLT)

Something just happens to us when we know we are chosen, special, set apart.

Let’s take the example of USA women’s gymnastics. Several years ago we purchased tickets to attend the USA Gymnastics Visa National Championships. We weren’t able to attend all the sessions (we gave some of our tickets away), but we did get to go to several, including the final day of competition. It was incredible to experience it live. Wow! Witnessing firsthand what those women were able to do is beyond words!

At the end, the decision was made as to whom would be going on to London as part of the USA Women’s Olympic Gymnastics Team. I don’t think there was a dry eye in that place when the girls who made it were announced. They had been picked, chosen, set apart for a special purpose.

Once they knew they had been chosen they were willing to endure several more months of, probably the most intense training they had ever been through so they could then represent the USA at the 2012 Olympics. And represent they did. Wow, what a year that was! Gabrielle Douglas won the all-around individual gold and Team USA won the gold medal for the team competition.

As much as I love to watch USA women’s gymnastics (already looking forward to Rio), I want to encourage you that, as a Believer, you have been chosen for even a much higher purpose – an eternal purpose.

You are a world changer, my friend, but you have to believe it. When you do, you will be willing to do what it takes, by God’s grace, to dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, and discipline.

Now, let’s keep analyzing that awesome scripture from Colossians.

Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you.

Do you know that, as a Believer in Jesus, you have been completely forgiven of ALL of your sins – past, present and future sins? If this is new news to you, I encourage you to read Hebrews 10:1-22.

Pay specific attention to verses 10, 12 and 14. Verse 10 says once for all time, verse 12 says good for all time and verse 14 says forever. Then verse 18 says this: And when sins have been forgiven, there is no need to offer any more sacrifices.

and here’s more good news…

Hebrews 9:24-26, 

24 For Christ did not enter into a holy place made with human hands, which was only a copy of the true one in heaven. He entered into heaven itself to appear now before God on our behalf. 25 And He did not enter heaven to offer Himself again and again, like the high priest here on earth who enters the Most Holy Place year after year with the blood of an animal. 26 If that had been necessary, Christ would have had to die again and again, ever since the world began. But now, once for all time, He has appeared at the end of the age to remove sin by His own death as a sacrifice. (NLT)

and even more good news…

Ephesians 1:7 says,

In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of His grace. (NASB) 

Notice that this last verse does not say our trespasses are forgiven according to how perfectly we behave. It says we’re forgiven according to the riches of His grace!

If this concept of total and complete forgiveness is new to you and you are like, Whoa, I don’t know about this Sandra. I want to believe it, but I’ve never heard anything like this before, I understand because I went through this same process when I first heard this phenomenal news.

If this is where you’re at right now, I encourage you to do one of two things: either get my book, I Tried Until I Almost Died, in which I explain our complete forgiveness in Christ in great detail and back it up with lots of scriptures or go to the right side of the homepage of this website and type forgiveness into the search bar. A number of posts will come up including one titled Our Forgiveness Secured.

One way or the other I encourage you to load yourself with truth about your complete forgiveness in Christ as a result of Jesus’ finished work on the cross. It’s critical to your Christian walk that you understand this Biblical truth.

Let’s just proceed on though, assuming all of us Believers have a revelation of our complete forgiveness in Christ. First, think about what happens to a person when they have guilt on their conscience. They react out of that guilt because they feel condemned for their sin. Well, it’s difficult to react to sin that has been removed from your conscience because of the precious blood of Jesus; therefore, you can go through life being assured of your forgiveness and that gives you both peace and confidence.

From my own personal experience, having a revelation of my complete forgiveness in Christ has made me SO much more secure. Referring back to the verse we are examining through further study, living with this peace and confidence has made all the difference for me in being able to be even-tempered, being content with second place and being able to be quick to forgive (as the Apostle Paul recommended in that verse).

Do you see how having the right belief that we are forever forgiven affects our behavior?

When you truly understand that you’ve been forgiven of all your sins – past, present and future sins – believe me, you will have a desire to forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you because of the change that receiving His gift of grace has made in your heart.

In all three cases this past week where I was mistreated, as a result of knowing I’m completely forgiven and having that peace and assurance in my own life, I didn’t struggle when I needed to make the choice to stop focusing on what the other person had just done to me. I was able, with God’s help and by His grace, to forgive as I have been forgiven and quickly move past each situation. In fact, I prayed for each person after each incident.

I felt like the Holy Spirit showed me that the first person reacted out of fear that they were inadequate and the second reacted out of their own emotional pain (from being hurt by others). I didn’t have a face-to-face discussion with the credit card thieves, but still prayed for them, that the deception they were living under would fall from their eyes, that they would have an encounter with Jesus and that they and all their family members would get saved. They didn’t know who they were messing with when they messed with Sandra McCollom. I love to pray! God is sending laborers across their path who will tell them the good news as sure as I’m sitting here typing this. Ha – take that credit card thieves. See you in Heaven!

See there, it’s true – If You Forgive, You Win!

Just imagine what would happen if Christians worldwide began to bless their enemies and pray for those who hurt them. Just imagine the love (and love = power) that would be released in the earth. Just imagine how many more people would be won over to the kingdom of God if we receive God’s grace to live like this.

It is only by His grace that this transition is possible. He is the only one who can help us see that this whole deal is not about what everybody is doing to us and instead help us to focus on the other person/people involved and on how they are reacting out of their own hurt, confusion, anxiety, frustration, etc.

Here’s the last part of that verse in Colossians:

And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it.

One last thought before we discuss forgiving ourselves. My husband and I read a really good parenting book recently called Loving Our Kids On Purpose by Danny Silk. It’s a great book for parents and other leaders as well. You can refer to my Facebook or Instagram page if you want to read the full post about the book, but there was one line part way through the book that just blew me away and has been helping me ever since.

This is not a direct quote because I want to rephrase it to fit this post, but here’s the gist of it : We are making a big mistake when we make other people’s problems our own problems. This hit me like a ton of bricks and I feel like this is very appropriate for this post.

It was important in my being able to handle the offenses I discussed above correctly that I was able to say to myself, This person has a problem, but I don’t need to make their problem my problem. I believe that is what we do when we give into bitterness, resentment and unforgiveness. We essentially take on the other person’s problem ourselves.

On the other hand, when we can identify the owner of the problem (and sometimes that is us), we are then able to stay calm and be empathetic toward the other person by truly feeling sorry that they are allowing this problem to affect their life.

This concept just gives us a whole new attitude toward the various situations we face. When we stop letting other people’s problems control us, we’ve just taken a huge step toward freedom.

What About Forgiving Ourselves?

I didn’t know this was going to be part of my post until yesterday morning when I spent almost an hour crying after being pulled over by a police officer for going 45mph in a 35mph zone. I really don’t get mad at myself very often at all anymore, but I sure was mad at myself and disappointed in myself yesterday morning.

I think I must have also been having a blood sugar crash as well because I could not stop crying for the longest time. I was a mess.

Finally, I calmed down enough to pray and I said this, God, I don’t feel like forgiving myself. I am so stinkin’ mad at myself. But I know I need to… so I choose to forgive myself right now, in Jesus’ name, Amen. I just had to refuse to go with my feelings – because remember that it’s not feelings that set us free – and choose to let the mistake go.

It wasn’t like I was speeding on purpose and I even found out later that in this particularly small community where people turn off the highway and then the speed limit drops to 35 mph, officers give out lots of tickets.

I know why I was so mad. It was because I had been pulled over for speeding about 6 months ago and I am not normally a speeder. In fact, I feel I’m a careful and conscientious driver, but I was talking with my girls on the way to their classes and we were just having a great time. I simply was not paying close enough attention and I do obviously need to be more aware of the speed limit signs.

I have an idea though – I can use cruise control from now on to make sure I don’t go over 35mph on that road.

On top of getting a speeding ticket I got an additional ticket. I could not find our new insurance card in our vehicle. We recently paid our insurance so we were definitely covered. I just didn’t have the card. I called my husband with the officer standing right there and asked him if he put the card in the glove compartment after paying for it. He had forgotten to put the insurance card in there.

Right then and there I had another choice to make. Was I going to blame my husband and talk to him disrespectfully on the phone right in front of the officer or was I going to remember that I have done that very same thing on several occasions after paying for the insurance myself. I have also forgotten to put the cards in the vehicles.

I’m glad to say I chose to treat Steve with love, but there were so many years that I treated Steve with disrespect, treating him as if he was stupid, as if he didn’t quite measure up and as if I was better than him. I didn’t do this all the time, but far too often for as long as I had been a Christian. The problem was, although I was a Christian, my mind was filled with wrong believing; therefore, I had lots of wrong behavior.

This is exactly why I remain in awe of God’s great grace toward me and the way He has changed me over the past 4 years. I mean, I just cannot get over it. He is so good to have saved me from my pharisaical self. I’m far from perfect, but the point is, I keep receiving His grace whether I’m having a good day or a bad day and it’s His grace that keeps changing me from the inside out.

I was telling my husband last night in front of my girls the story about me crying when the police officer handed me the ticket and how the back seat went dead silent. That doesn’t happen very often folks because my twin girls love to talk. I asked the girls what they were thinking and Starr responded, I was thinking that this is the most embarrassing day of my life because I’m sitting in the back seat with my pajamas and housecoat on and wondering what in the world that Police officer must be thinking.

I started laughing hysterically. I totally forgot that it was ‘pajama day’ at their Homelink classes. I didn’t think to say anything to the officer. He must have been wondering what in the world we were doing – hahahaha!

See there, I forgave myself and ended up having a really good laugh.

So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive His mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most - Hebrews 4:16 (NLT)

I encourage you to walk in forgiveness with others and yourself because there is no doubt about it – If you forgive, you win. Sometimes it may not look like you’re winning and you may be tempted to take matters into your own hands and try to control the situation and all the other people involved, but take it from me, leaving it in God’s hands and trusting Him is the most effective way to live!

If you have not yet made Jesus your Savior and received the wonderful joy that His finished work on the cross has provided for you to live in, please visit my page here titled Jesus In The Driver’s Seat. On this page I explain the good news of the gospel and you will have the opportunity to pray a prayer of salvation, making Jesus your Savior! Jesus loves you and His arms are wide open!

Sandra McCollom

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