I believe that God can do anything.  I really do believe that.  I believe that He can do miracles and even raise the dead.  I believe that he heals people and that he makes things happen that can only be described as miraculous.

I know that God CAN do these things, but I often question WILL God do these things for me.

I have walked with God since I was 12 years old so that makes it 36 years.  That’s a long time!  I’ve seen God do some really incredible things.  I’ve seen people healed, financial needs miraculously met, relationships restored through prayer, and a host of other things deemed as signs and wonders.

Yet, I sometimes still question the goodness of God towards me personally and his willingness to even consider my smallest requests.  Despite hearing other people testify about how God gave them their heart’s desire even in the smallest things, I wonder does God really care about me in that most intimate way . . . that even my smallest concerns are a concern to him.

He has the entire world to deal with, the galaxies to look after, not to mention all of the spiritual world that we know little about.  Why would the tiny desires of my heart matter to him?

How You See God Matters

I know that I struggle with these thoughts because I sometimes still struggle in how I see God.  I was brought up believing in a very angry God that hated sin and was the one that poured out all of his wrath upon Jesus as he hung naked on a bloody, torturous cross.  Somehow, he was supposedly no longer mad at me because he took his anger out on his son (in my place).  Yet, for all of my teen years, and most of my adult life I have struggled with still feeling like he’s been disappointed in me, even angry at me because when I’ve messed up I should have known better.

It’s probably because that’s how I feel about my own mistakes, and often, the mistakes of others . . . we should know better.

In my heart, I know that God is not like this.  I no longer preach a God like this, and I do understand that Jesus is the exact representation of God and Jesus wasn’t like this.  I know this yet I still struggle sometimes to believe it.

How can one believe one thing and think another?  How can I have faith and doubt at the same time? 

Faith and Doubt?

In the gospel book of Mark, there is a story of a man that struggled with this very thing.  This man brought his son to Jesus’ disciples to be healed from a mute spirit.  The disciples couldn’t get the boy delivered so when Jesus shows up the man explains to Jesus the situation.  The man says to Jesus, “But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.”  (see Mark 9:14-27)

I think this astonished Jesus because he replied, “If you can?  All things are possible to him who believes.”

The man responds, “I do believe, help my unbelief.” 

I think most of us can identify with this man.  “Lord, I do believe you can do this, help me in the areas that I struggle to believe.”

For me, I know that God can (that’s where my belief comes into play) but I struggle to believe that he will (that’s where my unbelief is).  I know he can, but will he?

He Can, But Will He?

I suspect that many reading this have struggled with this very issue at least once.  We know he can, but will he?

Lord, we believe, but help us in our unbelief.

Jesus, out of his great compassion and mercy, heals the man’s son.  So many times, Jesus has helped me too even when I wasn’t believing that he would help me.

How do we overcome our unbelief?  How do we go from believing he can to knowing that he will?  I don’t have five easy steps to get us there.  I wish I did.

I do think that I have one step, one very easy step.

Lord, I believe, help me in my unbelief.

I believe that this is a prayer that Jesus wants to answer.  I know that this is a prayer I pray.  I know that God can, and I am determined to believe that he will! This is the step we need to take!

Related Posts:

Three Reasons I Struggle To Believe God is Good

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